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I Give Up
I Give Up! Despite the bully barrage of positive memes that tell me not to. Despite the smile covered “shoulds” people offer without invitation. You can place a sound and safe bet, that anything following, “You should just” is probably bullshit advice. It’s very likely that it’s coming from someone completely Unaware of the path you walk. Those who have been in your shoes will share their story with helpful hopes. Those with True Empathy will listen, and sit in uncomfortable silence with you. Knowing that, sometimes, there’s nothing they can do, but share in that shitty place with you for a little while; so you know You’re Not Alone.…
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What The Cup?!
Cupping wasn’t even really on my radar until it was suggested to me mid massage, but I so wish I would have known about it a long time ago. So, here I am, putting it on your radar because it’s a self-care cup of awesome that you’ve gotta try. I’ve been getting regular massages for a little over a year to help with the recovery of my shoulder after surgery; two surgeries actually. It’s been super helpful, and luckily I’ve found someone who’s good at getting deep down in the tissue, but nothing compares to these amazing little cups that literally suck the stress right out of you. So what…
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Maybe I’m Too Difficult
Or maybe I’m not. Today’s Messiful Me–Time is being brought to you by a cup of cocoa, the color “Mama–genta”, and the idea of “Being Difficult” I went to fill my mama cup with a little mani, but none of the colors were speaking to me. I wanted purple, but not a super deep purple. I kinda wanted pink. I kinda wanted red. I wanted blue, but not because I really wanted blue. I just love blue so I kept getting stuck on the shade. I was being “Difficult”. Or was I. My whole life I’ve heard about how I’m being too difficult. How I need to stop being so…
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This Is Why Little Girls Never Get Tired Of Talking
They never get tired because, as a little girl, I never got tired. I drove my mother nuts, so it only stands to reason that they won’t shut up until they drive me off the edge. Their daughters will extend the same verbal generosity, I’m sure. The cycle is genius. Well played karma, well played! Call it Wishful thinking, but I still believe peace and quiet are possible. I’m pretty sure the way I imagine my quiet time, though, is a little inappropriate. While some people dream in black and white, and some in color, I dream, day dream that is, in “Shut-Ups!” I don’t remember fantasizing quite as much…
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I’m Just A Mama, Raising Rouge Rebels
“Mama, I just killed a man. Put my cart against his and, ran him over now he’s dead.” He’ll be okay, though. I only killed him A little. Inside. His masculinity I mean. How dare I not move when he was in my way? I mean come on, haven’t I learned, by now, to be completely passive and submissive? How could I have the audacity to take up Too much space? I’m a little dense when it comes to the etiquette of oppression, so I guess I’ll just ask to be excused for being bold enough to believe that men don’t own every walkway. Especially not in the grocery store. That’s our domain!…
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7 Things Mamas Are Afraid To Admit
Tonight I went to yet another open house. Yay me. I love seeing my child’s progress, and the way they light up with pride as they show me around is really the only reason I go, but isn’t that what book bags are for? Send all that ish home. They can tell me all about it and then I can go ninja, and discard it while they sleep. Yes, I recycle about 90% of what my kids bring home, yes I do. I get that we are a social species. I guess I should enjoy the comradery, and the ice cream, and the beauty of a hundred people navigating narrow hallways, talking…
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Are You Raising A Little Butthole?
Yes, sometimes kids are butt-holes. In fact most of the time kids are but-tholes, until we successfully teach them Not to be butt-holes. Even when we achieve that, though, they will still have butt-hole moments. If it just so happens that your kid is one of those rare angels that’s never a butt-hole, please do not tell the rest of us. I know they are out there, and I will take a minute to be happy for you when all of my 4 kids are being non-butt-holes at the Same time. I wouldn’t hold my breath. I know you’re probably thinking, “Xavia, that’s a lot of “butt-holes”, but I’m trying to paint…
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“I Ain’t Sorry” (5 Things You Should Never Apologize For)
Beyonce ain’t sorry, why should I be? I’m not, am I? Am I really sorry for all the things I apologize for? No, I’m not! Are you? If I’m not sorry, though, why do the words fall out of my mouth like the peas I’m always trying to hide in my kids’ pasta? Once I really started paying attention to how much I say, “I’m sorry” I caught an attitude. Okay, so I didn’t catch an attitude, I always have one, but this one had more of a “punch you in the throat” type of vibe. “Sorry, I’m late. The baby pooped as I was headed out the door.” “Oh, sorry”,…
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The Worst Kind Of Mom
Hey mamas, miss me? Of course you did. Maybe. Sorta. A little. Luckily my reputation is built on a Throne of hot mess so no one has particularly high standards for me, and for that I’m pretty genius. I’d like to say I’ve been super busy with all these amazing projects and awesomeness and my Messiful just got pushed to the sideline, but the truth is, I’ve become the worst kind of mom. A lot of people would probably assume that a “Bad” mom is the worst kind. Forgetting to pick your kid up, then remembering after you’re already 20 minutes late. Sending in a chocolate almond bar with your…
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3 Things That Are Much Better Than Resolutions
Are we all Over the whole New Year thing yet? It’s been over a week, so I’m sure we are. We’ve all eaten a sugar laden cupcake, or said the swear word we swore we wouldn’t, right? I don’t mean to make fun of resolutions. Well no, that’s Exactly what I mean to do, but I don’t mean for anyone to take it personal. I’m sure you bought that new, cute gym outfit with the best of Intentions. Let’s keep it real though, more than half of us make resolutions that simply make us miserable. They’re generally not anything we Want to do. They’re all chock full of Shoulds. So,…
