I know I can’t be the only one who practices accepting an award. I’m very gracious, and my speeches always include a big “Thank you to my fans!” I never forget get choked up, waiving my hand in front of my eyes to hold back the tears. I’ve won Grammy’s and Oscars. I’ve even won a Tony. I’ve tried practicing my speech for winning Mother of the Year too but, somehow, in my imagination I never quite make it to the podium. I can’t say I’m surprised, though. There are 10 very distinct reasons I will likely lose the award before I ever have a chance to hold the golden pacifier,…