• Confess the Mess,  Featured,  Uncategorized

    This Is Why Little Girls Never Get Tired Of Talking

    They never get tired because, as a little girl, I never got tired. I drove my mother nuts, so it only stands to reason that they won’t shut up until they drive me off the edge. Their daughters will extend the same verbal generosity, I’m sure. The cycle is genius. Well played karma, well played! Call it Wishful thinking, but I still believe peace and quiet are possible. I’m pretty sure the way I imagine my quiet time, though, is a little inappropriate. While some people dream in black and white, and some in color, I dream, day dream that is, in “Shut-Ups!” I don’t remember fantasizing quite as much…

  • Confess the Mess,  Featured,  Uncategorized

    7 Things Moms Are Afraid To Admit

    Tonight I went to yet another open house. Yay me. I love seeing my child’s progress, and the way they light up with pride as they show me around is really the only reason I go, but isn’t that what book bags are for? Send all that ish home. They can tell me all about it and then I can go ninja, and discard it while they sleep. Yes, I recycle about 90% of what my kids bring home, yes I do. I get that we are a social species. I guess I should enjoy the comradery, and the ice cream, and the beauty of a hundred people navigating narrow hallways, talking…

  • Featured,  Manage the Mess,  Uncategorized

    “I Ain’t Sorry” (5 Things You Should Never Apologize For)

    Beyonce ain’t sorry, why should I be? I’m not, am I? Am I really sorry for all the things I apologize for? No, I’m not! Are you? If I’m not sorry, though, why do the words fall out of my mouth like the peas I’m always trying to hide in my kids’ pasta? Once I really started paying attention to how much I say, “I’m sorry” I caught an attitude. Okay, so I didn’t catch an attitude, I always have one, but this one had more of a “punch you in the throat” type of vibe. “Sorry, I’m late. The baby pooped as I was headed out the door.” “Oh, sorry”,…

  • Featured,  Mama Says...

    Fresh Outta Ducks

    The further I get down my life’s journey, the less I feel like I have to prove myself to Anyone. Those who know me, know me. Those who want to, will. Those who don’ either won’t care, or they’ll make something up. Whichever category people fall into, none of their opinions really matter. It doesn’t matter what they think, or expect of me, and none of them Define me. It’s not a lesson that I think they’ll absorb right away, and it certainly isn’t lesson that I’ve mastered, but I still have to Plant the seed. The question is, how? How do I help my kids develop the same attitude while they’re still…

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    The Secret To Giving Mama The Perfect Gift

    This post may contain affiliate links   It’s that time of year again, and everyone is scrambling for the Perfect gifts for everyone on their list. I’m not for Black Friday or all the madness that comes along with excessive shopping, but I do think there’s something nice about a thoughtful gift for those close to you. I think we all intend to put a little Extra love and care into what we give the moms in our lives, but do you really know how to Wow a mom? Do you know how to nail it on the head, no matter what your budget? Well, you’re in luck. I just happen…

  • Featured,  Mama Says...,  The Kitchen Sink

    How Much Would It Cost To Replace Me

    I’ve been under quite a bit of stress lately. I’m using all my Messiful tools but it seems as though I simply have too much on my plate. Really, it’s on my shoulders, because that’s where I hold my stress. So much so that this past weekend my neck went on strike. Like, “you don’t pay me enough for this shit, I’m out!  I haven’t had a massage or chiropractic in months, and you want to add More to the load?” Literally every muscle in my neck and shoulders seized up to the point where I could not move my head. The only way to find any relief from the…

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    Pour Yourself A Messiful Mama

    This post may contain affliate links The “Messiful Mama” is a little cocktail I came up with one night when I was finally home from a 4 day stay at the hospital with my daughter. I’m sure you can imagine, when I got back I was worn out and stressed out; a bit of a Mess.  Kind of like how a of people are feeling about this election. It’s like a long drawn out hospital stay. You’re sick, uncomfortable, waiting for the doctor to finally give you a diagnosis so you can Go home and recover. Well, we’re on our way home. One way or another, tomorrow morning it will…

  • Confess the Mess,  Featured,  Uncategorized

    5 Times Your Kids Will Do Exactly As You Say

    I’d like to boast that my kids always do as I say, the first time, Without protest or complaint, but I’d be lying. I have to repeat myself more than I’d like to admit. I’m sure we all have that one Signature phrase we find ourselves saying multiple times a day. Once the clock strikes 7 I am just about ready to nix talking all together and take a vow of silence. There are exceptions though. There are times that they do exactly as I ask and I find myself maybe wishing that they hadn’t. Here are 5 times I wish my kids were a lot less than obedient. When I’m in the shower…

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    The Time I Stalked That One Woman (And The 5 Things I Learned About Shopping Craigslist As A Mama)

    My daughter’s birthday is rolling around, but I think this year I’m going to hit the chill button a bit. I usually go all out trying to make it special, from party details to the perfect cake, outfit and that one special gift that will set the memory of the entire day. What usually happens, though, is I spend all this time, money and energy and their favorite part of everything ends up being the $5 pack of balloons that they pop around at the end of the party. Talk about a let down; I’ve definitely learned to tone it down. My oldest daughter, though, can be a bit loftier than my…

  • Confess the Mess,  Featured

    How I Lost My Mind Over A Bottle Of SmartWater

        So, #confessthemess, I may have lost my mind kinda, sorta, just a little, lotta, bit over a bottle of SmartWater. “Who drank my water?” Blank stares, slightly aware of the severity but not yet completely afraid. “Where is my water, who drank my water? Where’s my water?! Help me understand. How many times have I told you guys to leave my water alone? Why do you continue to drink my water? There is plenty of water in the house. It’s not like it’s an irresistible bag of M&M’s. It’s not cake, or juice or a tall cold glass of fresh squeezed lemonade; it’s water,  water,     Room…